A class in English is in progress at the Chung Hwa Chinese School. There are 32 Chinese children of the average age of eight in the class.
Class: (stands up as Lin Sen, their teacher enters the class , in Mandarin) Good morning, Teacher.
Teacher: (Also in Mandarin) Good morning, we are going to study English this morning. Please open your book to page 1. There are three new words to learn on this page. I'll write the words on the blackboard. Siew Yin, the third row, please spell the first word.
Siew Yin: "A" ...... (hesitates)......
Teacher: What's the letter? "P", yes another "P". What's after "P", Ah Bang?
Ah Bang: "L" , Teacher.
Teacher: Good, Ah Bang. Next letter, Siew Yin?
Siew Yin: "E", Teacher.
Teacher: Right, Siew Yin. Now, the whole class, spell the word.
Class: (in a loud chorus) "A P P L E" !
Teacher: Yes, "APPLE", apple. Look at the picture of the apple in your books. Now, hands up all those who have seen a real apple.
(Not a single hand goes up.....)
Teacher: (Suddenly realizes.) Oh, I forget, you were all born before the War and apples have not come back to the village since the War ended six months ago. Never mind, I'll bring the class some apples when I come across them in town.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Sunday, February 15, 2009
The Unreal World: (4) Is smoking bad for you?
Ah Seng is having coffee with his friend, Ah Beng in the village kopitiam.
Ah Seng: You seem to be smoking quite a lot. Isn't it bad for you?
Ah Beng: What twenty cigarettes a day, bad for me? That's not too many. They relax me, and I can think better smoking them.
Ah Seng: But you do cough a lot lately. I hear they can give you TB.
Ah Beng: Nonsense! Besides, I smoke the best....Abdulla's and Senior Service, all imported from the UK. My mother-in-law smokes the local red uncured tobacco by the pound and she's almost eighty today, she's sound as a bell! (Shouts) Eh, boy, one more round of kopi kau and a packet of Abdulla 30.
Ah Seng: You seem to be smoking quite a lot. Isn't it bad for you?
Ah Beng: What twenty cigarettes a day, bad for me? That's not too many. They relax me, and I can think better smoking them.
Ah Seng: But you do cough a lot lately. I hear they can give you TB.
Ah Beng: Nonsense! Besides, I smoke the best....Abdulla's and Senior Service, all imported from the UK. My mother-in-law smokes the local red uncured tobacco by the pound and she's almost eighty today, she's sound as a bell! (Shouts) Eh, boy, one more round of kopi kau and a packet of Abdulla 30.
Friday, February 13, 2009
The Unreal World: (3) A Job for Sulong
After dinner at Ali's house.
Mak Minah (Ali's wife): Our son, Sulong has been talking to me about what he wants to do.
Ali: What does he want to do? He's past his eighteen years and must think of his future.
Mak Minah: He wants to join the police. He and his close friend Awang think there's good prospect for them in that service. The pay is good and the job is secure.
Ali: There, I must say I agree with them. But he must get the job first.
Mak Minah: Yes, you're right. Matter of fact, they are planning to go to the police depot at Banting on the post-office bus next week. But he wants your agreement and blessing first.
Ali:(With some enthusiasm.) That he has, though I would like to have a good talk with him before he goes.
Mak Minah (Ali's wife): Our son, Sulong has been talking to me about what he wants to do.
Ali: What does he want to do? He's past his eighteen years and must think of his future.
Mak Minah: He wants to join the police. He and his close friend Awang think there's good prospect for them in that service. The pay is good and the job is secure.
Ali: There, I must say I agree with them. But he must get the job first.
Mak Minah: Yes, you're right. Matter of fact, they are planning to go to the police depot at Banting on the post-office bus next week. But he wants your agreement and blessing first.
Ali:(With some enthusiasm.) That he has, though I would like to have a good talk with him before he goes.
The Unreal World: (2) At the Barber Shop
Ah Seng is having a haircut at the barber shop run by Murthy in the village.
Ah Seng: I was here last month and you were not here. I was told you were on holiday in India.
Murthy: That's right, I was on my annual visit to my family in Madras.
Ah Seng: Oh, visiting your wife, I suppose.
Murthy: (Laughing.) And my two children!
Ah Seng: (Teasing him.) And another one in about nine months' time.
Murthy: I hope, I hope.
The haircut done, Ah Seng pays him a dollar for it, waves and goes out of the shop.
Ah Seng: I was here last month and you were not here. I was told you were on holiday in India.
Murthy: That's right, I was on my annual visit to my family in Madras.
Ah Seng: Oh, visiting your wife, I suppose.
Murthy: (Laughing.) And my two children!
Ah Seng: (Teasing him.) And another one in about nine months' time.
Murthy: I hope, I hope.
The haircut done, Ah Seng pays him a dollar for it, waves and goes out of the shop.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
The Unreal World: (1) Ali and Ah Seng
The war has ended six months ago and the British have returned to rule over the country. A country road leading to the sea. Ah Seng is riding on his old bicycle on a country road leading to the sea and, as he nears the mangrove clumps by the beach, he sees Ali coming toward him. He jumps down from the bicycle and calls to him.
Ali: Oh hai, Ah Seng, where are you off to?
Ah Seng: Hai Ali, good to see you? Going fishing for ikan gelama in my boat.
Ali: Oh, I hear you're quite a fisherman. I hope you have a good catch.
Ah Seng: Thanks. Oh, by the way, I meant to come and see you for
some coconuts. My wife wants to cook up some oil for our use. Are you at home tomorrow morning?
Ali: Sure, I'll be home. Come at any time. How many nuts will
you be wanting?
Ah Seng: Oh, not many, about ten will do.
Ali: Well, It'll be twelve cents each now.
Ah Seng: Hey, that's up two more cents each. But, that's all right with me, I badly need oil for our lamps.
(He climbs on his bicycle and paddles off toward the sea.)
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